Remembering 9/11/01

I remember like it was yesterday exactly where I was when I heard about the 9/11 attacks. My alarm went off in bed in my San Diego apartment at 5:45am (Good ol' Howard Stern). The only thing I heard was him saying to turn on the TV's because the world trade center had been hit with something. I shot up out of bed and turned on my TV in the living room. I had to get ready for my 8am class at school so I took a shower and I remember when I came out to look at the TV again I saw with my own eyes the second plane hit the second tower! I couldn't believe it. I just started crying, as I knew what that meant for so many people on that plane and in those buildings. I fell to my knees. I felt so helpless...

I ended up going to school and I was so shocked that my first professor didn't even say anything about the attacks and went on as usual. My second class instructor was freaking out and told us she had to leave because she was from New York and she doesn't know if her family is ok. At that point our school SDSU was evacuated and all classes were canceled because the threat of the attacks was spreading to the west coast. After scrambling out of school and waiting almost an hour to get out of the parking lot, I raced home and glued myself to the TV again. I stayed put on my couch through the entire night and into the next day...crying, sobbing, wondering and feeling so hopeless. My worst fear is losing someone I love, so I couldn't imagine what all those people in New York were feeling that day and every day since then...

10 years later, it still feels like yesterday and I can remember every second of it. I have been watching the news with my 3 1/2 year old daughter trying to show her what happened. To her, it's just a part of history and she won't ever know what it was like to be there. So many lives were affected and I still have such a hard time with the guilt I feel for not being able to do much from where I was/am...

I will never forget that day and today on this 10th anniversary, I am so proud to be an American and am so thankful for all the men and women who serve our country with pride and love. My heart goes out to all the family and friends of those who lost their lives in New York, Washington and Pennsylvania. You will never be forgotten.

I hold my family closer today because of you...
I live my life more fully because of you....
I love with my heart more open because of you...

Today I live in the memory of all the victims of 9/11.


Blessed,
Amanda